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Knocked Over By A Feather

IT WAS A BIG FUCKING FEATHER…

Those Were The Days: 80’s Version

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Oh, Archie!!

One of my favorite shows growing up was “All in the Family.”

Syndication made sure that I became quite familiar with Archie Bunker, his ditzy wife Edith, whiny daughter Gloria and his outspoken son-in-law Michael, aka Meathead.

Perhaps some of you are too young to remember this show, in which case I think that Hulu has it streaming. (Don’t quote me on this.)

If so, go watch it, seriously. It broke shitloads of boundaries back in the 70’s and in a way, it’s like taking a history class.

For those of you who do remember this awesome television show (fellow old farts like me), I took it upon myself to do an 80’s version of the theme song, “Those Were The Days.”

Why, you ask?

Because I was really fucking bored and I can.

So, for your consideration, I bring to you this utter piece of crap for your enjoyment.


Man, the way Bon Jovi played
No such thing as throwing shade
Kids like us we had it made
Those were the days

And we knew who we were then
We played Pac-Man til nine or ten
We could totally use a man
Like Max Headroom again

art-of-noise-pranoimia-max-headroom-official-music-video

We crimped our hair with fashion plates
On Friday nights we’d roller skate
Gee, my old Dodge Omni ran great
Those were the days


If you have any ideas percolating, I’d love to see it.

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Cover Songs: Tired of Waiting For You

My 20-year-old daughter sent me a video link on Facebook messenger the other day.

I clicked on it and gave it a listen.

“This is a cover song, dear. Green Day didn’t write it,” I replied back.

“Oh. They didn’t?”

“Nope. Google The Kinks.”

I thought it was hilarious, personally. There she was, trying to school me on her favorite band and instead, I’m schooling her on my favorite decade of music

It’s so much fun when generations clash and go boom, intermingling to create a comically fucked up moment in musical history.

But, being a fan of both bands, I’m finding myself in a pickle.

A pickle jam.

I can’t decide which version I prefer, the original by The Kinks or the cover by Green Day.

What do you guys think?



Tired of Waiting For You Cover by Green Day 2011

Original version by The Kinks 1965

I’m so tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you

I’m so tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you

I was a lonely soul
I had nobody till I met you
But you keep-a me waiting
All of the time
What can I do?

It’s your life
And you can do what you want
Do what you like
But please don’t keep-a me waiting
Please don’t keep-a me waiting

‘Cause I’m so tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you

So tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you

I was a lonely soul
I had nobody till I met you
But you keep-a me waiting
All of the time
What can I do?

It’s your life
And you can do what you want
Do what you like
But please don’t keep-a me waiting
Please don’t keep-a me waiting

‘Cause I’m so tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you

So tired
Tired of waiting
Tired of waiting for you
For you
For you

Aunt Mildred and Her Owls

When I was growing up, our neighbors to the left of us were an older couple, with grown up kids. They were always around though, coming and going. I remember that their son had an orange Chow who enjoyed scaring the hell out of me through the fence in our backyard. I could see him snarling at me, between our tomato and green pepper plants.

He was a mean dog who wanted to eat plump little me if he had gotten the chance, I’m sure of it.

My mom became tight with the woman of the house, forging a strong friendship despite their age differences, which only proves the fact that age means absolutely fucking nothing when it comes to relationships.

My brother and I called her Aunt Mildred, out of respect for our elders. It wouldn’t have been right to call her Milly like my mom did, plus she did have an “aunt” kind of vibe about her.

I have many memories of Aunt Mildred. One time, while we were all at a store, I pointed to a box of Summer’s Eve disposable douches and asked her what they were.

She got all flustered right before my young eyes. “Ask your mom, Merry.”

My mom said that it wasn’t anything that I needed to be concerned about for a long time, now go walk the yellow line and get outta my hair, kid.


yellow line
We 80’s kids knew how to live on the edge.


Aunt Mildred was a quiet, sweet, kindhearted woman who moved to northeast Ohio (for some reason) from Alabama. She had a bit of an accent and a gentle lilt to her voice that was soothing to listen to. I always hovered around the adults when I was younger, listening intently to their conversations, hoping for some magical insight on what being an adult was all about.

I also hoped to catch a swear word now and then.

It all seemed pretty swell to me. If I had only known the truth, maybe I would have spent more time walking the yellow line like my mom always told me to do.

In jest, I’m sure. Um…it was a joke, haha.

I think.

Anyways, the main thing that I remember about Aunt Mildred was that she loved owls. She collected them. She had owl knickknacks, coffee mugs, wall art, clothing, throw blankets…anything that you can think of that’s inside a home, there was an owl on it.

When she moved a few cities away, we stayed in contact with her, until one day, we didn’t. Life happens as it does and people fade away from our life.

I hadn’t thought of her in years until the other night when I was coloring on my smart phone, which is now a new nightly habit of mine.

While I was searching for another picture to bring to life, I came across these owls. She instantly sprung to my mind and I decided to start working on it, taking my time to make it perfect.


21686169_10155902303282259_1665979319561533660_n
“The Who”


According to my calculations, there’s a chance that she’s still alive. If so, she’d be in her early 80’s by now.

At any rate, I colored this in her memory. She was a lovely person and I’m glad to have known her.

It’s amazing to me how little things like a love for owls can trigger a memory of a person that touched my life so many years ago.

*My mom corrected me below in the comments. Aunt Mildred was younger than I thought, she’d be in her early 80’s now. I had originally said that she’d be in her early 90’s. Thanks, mom.*

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