One of the greatest pleasures in my life is making people laugh.

I wasn’t good at it when I was of elementary age, or else the kids at my parochial school had no senses of humor. Now that I think back on it, they were all somewhat stuffy. I was unable to form any kind of bond with the children I grew up with. Kindergarten thru 8th grade wasn’t easy without a kindred spirit and sidekick by my side.

I was a lonely kid who mostly played with my kid brother and my Barbies. I spent much of my time hanging around the adults, learning all I could from my dry as Melba toast father and my twisty like an ice cream cone mother, two of the funniest people I have ever known.

No, I didn’t start to hone my craft until I was a teen. It’s how I made my small group of close friends, a few I still have to this day. laugh

A very simplistic philosophy, for I am a very simple person.

I wasn’t going to win them over with my stellar good looks, or my expensive Keds. My milkshakes didn’t bring all of the boys to the yard. My perm wasn’t springy enough. My eyeliner had a mind of its own, and I deplored the smell of Aquanet.

But I was sarcastic and quick-witted, so why not use those talents with the hopes that I didn’t end up eating my reduced price lunch alone?

I once had a coworker tell me that I should do stand-up, but I am far too shy. It’s almost like having someone watch you pee. I can’t do it if I have a live audience, unless you count my daughter, who will have a whole conversation with me while I sit awkwardly on the toilet.


Swell. Can you pass the air freshener?

I suppose I should take some of the blame here. I have become an open door whizzer, but only within the comfort of my own home. My daughter doesn’t realize that most normal people close the door when they use the facilities to urinate. I feel for her future husband, and my yet to be born grandkids.

A family who tinkles in front of each other stays together, or something.

I’ve lost my funny bone many times, but I end up finding it again each and every time it goes astray.


It’s also my saving grace and I owe it much more than just a hit of the wacky tobaccy.

So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you humor, for saving my whiny ass and making life suck a little less.

Exit, stage right.