I have a confession to make.

I think most of you all know how lonely I am. I have so much idle time. I try to fill it in the best that I can under my circumstances, but the truth is, I miss having a social life. I never thought that it would bother me so much, since I am basically an introvert. I do have extrovert tendencies. I find myself missing having friends to hang out with.

So the other day, under the worried glare of my daughter (she does care, after all) I made an ad on Craigslist under the personal ads.

Strictly platonic, obviously.

This is what I wrote.

Hello. I guess this ad is my way of trying to connect with someone who can relate to what I am dealing with in my life right now. It is a long shot, but why the hell not? Worst thing that can happen, no one will reply or I’ll find myself a nice ax murderer.

Let me begin by saying that I am married and straight. I dabbled with females when I was younger, but at the end of the day, I like penises. (My husbands.) So please, I am 100% not interested in a sexual relationship. Thank you.

I am 40 years old and on disability due to a disease called fibromyalgia. This means that I am almost always in pain and often damned tired. My old friends ditched my ass. I can still get around though, I just can’t walk long distances. No rock climbing for me.

Basically, I am lonely. I miss working!

You needn’t also be disabled, just understanding of my limitations. I am still a fun person to be around, 420 friendly, enjoy chatting over coffee and whatever else that doesn’t require me to overexert myself. I just want someone to hang out with sometimes, to break up my exciting life of binge watching Netflix and taking naps.

I would prefer someone ages 35-55….without a huge generational gap. No offense to the younger people, I just imagine that I would be more compatible with someone who remembers the 80’s.

Some of my hobbies include The Beatles, painting, reading, coloring (such a stress reducer!) and writing. I have a blog. No, not famous by a long shot.

Anyways, if this post made you laugh at all or you think that perhaps we would hit it off, please send me a quick shout. Thank you and have a great day.

So yeah. Pathetic, right? I’m so embarrassed.

So far, I have gotten a few replies from seemingly normal people. Like any relationship, whether it be romantic or otherwise, there has to be some sort of chemistry. I am hopeful that I will connect with someone, but I will do so slowly and very carefully.

My question to all of my wonderful virtual friends; would you ever place an ad like this?

Update: I took the ad down because people are creepy. Not a good idea. Oh well.