My husband and I will be celebrating 15 years together November 1st (our first date) and our 8th wedding anniversary September 26th. It blows my mind that we’ve been a couple this long. We were both still in our 20’s when we met.
Well, late 20’s.
My health problems and the monumental changes that I’ve been through the last few years have been difficult on my entire family, but especially him. When your once strong as fuck wife starts to cry constantly, endure panic attacks, lose the ability to work and develop severe fibromyalgia within a 6 month span, of course you’re going to be affected.
I often feel like he got the short end of the stick. He didn’t sign up for this, having a chronically sick wife. Thank heavens that my mental health is so much better now, (I do not take this for granted) but I have so many physical limitations that he has no choice but to pick up the slack.
He cooks dinner most nights. He does the laundry. He vacuums. He picks up dog shit.
There are days when I can do stuff around here, but even so, I am paying it back soon afterwards. If I attempted to run the vacuum, I wouldn’t even be able to push it across the floor. That is how weak I am now.
He came home from work one day recently and caught me sweeping the kitchen floor.
“Stop that. Go sit down, you’re going to hurt yourself.”
I gave him a raspberry and kept sweeping.
He sighed and shook his head.
“I can sweep the damn floor, for fuck sake!” I said, irked, but also touched that he was so concerned.
“You can, I just know that it hurts you to do it.”
How can you argue with the truth?
We’re both trying to adapt to the new normal around here. Tables have turned, the tide has changed and things will never be the same as they used to be.
We’ve been working on bringing intimacy back into our relationship, with my therapist coaching on the sidelines. We’re both on board this crazy train called life, together.
May I quote from one of my favorite songs?
No? Well, tough dog shit. I’m gonna anyway, don’t make me give you a raspberry.
We’ve been together since way back when
Sometimes I never want to see you again
But I want you to know, after all these years
You’re still the one I want whisperin’ in my earYou’re still the one — I want to talk to in bed
Still the one — that turns my head
We’re still having fun, and you’re still the one