This is my almost too late entry for ES’s Annual Contest of Whatever, starring Sir Paul (well-known) and introducing Pinky the Unicorn (made up by moi.)


Sir Paul: Pinky, what are you doing down there in the sink, dear?

Pinky: I’m hiding.

Sir Paul: From what, love?

Pinky: The world, Sir Paul. It’s scary.

Sir Paul: It can be, yes.


Pinky: There are so many mean people and such bad things happening to good people. I’ve been so anxious that I’ve run out of my fucking Klonopin already for the month. And those stupid asshat jerks at the drugstore won’t fill my prescription yet!

So here I am, in this rusty ass sink.

Sir Paul: First of all, I had no idea that unicorns had such filthy mouths.

But that aside, you forgot an important message, something my mates and I used to sing about, dearest one.

Pinky: What’s that, Sir Paul?


Sir Paul: All you need is love.

Pinky: Well, shit. Yes, you’re right. Thanks, Sir Paul!

But if it’s okay, I’d like to stay down here in the sink for just a little bit longer.

Sir Paul: This sink does have great acoustics…

Pinky: You’re my favorite Beatle, Sir Paul.

Sir Paul: So am I.